I wasn’t going to read Aimee Byrd’s The Sexual Reformation [1], but then I heard her on a podcast (and then another and another) and I needed to know what she was talking about. Byrd has come to be somewhat of a controversial figure in the reformed and evangelical world. Her last book, Recovering from Biblical Manhood & Womanhood (my review here), got her a lot of flak to say the least. My very short take on that book was that while I tend to agree with Byrd in principle, at least on the big issues, I did not find her argument well-reasoned and I have particular concerns about her handling of the biblical text. While I didn’t particularly want to engage with this new book, when I heard her talk and learned that the book is on the Song of Songs and that she draws particular theories about gender from its words, I was intrigued. Since my own background is in biblical Hebrew, I couldn’t resist the pull to see what she was saying about this controversial Old Testament book and how she applies it to modern problems.
There is a lot to discuss here and I think I could write something almost as long as the book itself (which is just shy of 200 pages, by the way). I am going to divide the material up into sections and try to present Byrd’s arguments and my reactions in each one.
Why This Book
In the interviews I have heard, Byrd makes clear that this book comes out of her own experiences over the last couple of years. In a time when she felt oppressed, even by members of her own denomination, the Song of Songs was a comfort to her.
Beyond her personal connection, Byrd aims to restore the Song in modern interpretation. Too often in recent years it has been used as a kind of marriage manual with a focus on the horizontal relationship between husband and wife (p. 2). Byrd looks back to earlier interpretive frameworks which have understood the Song more typologically (p. 43) [2] while also seeking to find some middle ground between “flat-footed” modern approaches and earlier allegorical ones (p. 35).
As she did in her previous book, Byrd also seeks to counter the view of complementarianism espoused by the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood (CBMW). Though I think her critiques of this particular movement are at times overstated, I agree with her when she says that “[e]ven the church is still confused about what it means to be a man or a woman.” (p. 1) In the time we are in, the Church needs clear answers to the question of what it means to be male and female and why it even matters that we have two genders. While there are some good resources out there [3], broadly speaking we just don’t have answers to the questions our society is asking.
Byrd’s stated goal in writing The Sexual Reformation is “[t]he recovery of the dignity and personhood of both man and woman” (p. xv). “With the Song of Songs guiding us,” she says, “we will explore the theological meaning behind our sexes, helping Christians to better understand our sexuality as a gift and to grasp the eschatological story our bodies tell of Christ’s love for his church.” (p. xiv) Her purpose is not just theoretical but also practical as she calls us to act upon this new understanding of the sexes: “I’m calling for a small-r reformation in the church regarding the way we understand what the Holy Spirit is saying to the churches about our sexuality.” (p. 17)
While I am not as convinced as Byrd that the Song of Songs is the key to answering all our questions about gender, I do think she is right that there are questions to be answered and that the Church as a whole has not done a good job at finding those answers.
Byrd’s Thesis
Byrd presents her approach to the Song of Songs as a new synthesis of older typological or allegorical interpretations with a modern application for marriage and gender. In these older interpretations the man and woman in the Song are types representing Christ and His bride, the Church. Byrd builds on this, relating the male and female figures not just to Christ and the Church but seeing in the Song an “enfleshing” of “the whole metanarrative of Scripture” (p. 21).
The marriage relationship is a microcosm, an encapsulated version, of God’s relationship with His people (p. 135). For Byrd this relationship and the spousal love of Christ for His Church is what all Scripture is about (p. 93). There is “a typology in God’s design of man and woman, one that unfolds throughout the canon of Scripture” (p. 25). The Bible begins and ends with a wedding (p. 32) and here in the Song, in the middle of the canon, we find another wedding. It is in the Song that we learn “what it really is to be loved, all about desire, all about beauty. The meaningfulness of our sexuality, and our own identity as the bride of Christ.” (p. 25)
The story that Byrd sees playing out in Scripture is also “enfleshed” (a word she uses frequently). That is, our bodies also speak (p. 44) and “tell the story of a gift given in eternity . . . Imagine man and woman revealing the deep mystery of an eternal trinitarian covenant that is prefigured in creation” (p. xi).
I like that Byrd is going back to a more typological interpretation of the Song. I think some recent uses of the book have gone far afield (and even become rather pornographic). The connection between the man/woman and Christ and His Church seems undeniable and is supported by other biblical passages. I would stop short, however, of saying that this is the metanarrative of Scripture. It is an important relationship, certainly, and there is no doubt that God in creating two genders is teaching us about Himself and about our relationship to Him, but is this the story of Scripture? It seems to miss elements. There is much in Byrd’s interpretation about love but little about fall and redemption. I am wary as well of those who connect gender so closely with the Trinity. This is one of the failings of some corners of the complementarian world which Byrd herself criticizes, that they read human gender issues back into the Trinity, but she seems to fall prey to the same tendency (p. 202).
Expanding the Typology
The many types of the woman in particular are significant for Byrd: She is connected to water and wellsprings (pp. 47, 66). She is the New Jerusalem, the holy city (p. 87). She is Zion (p. 81). Her body, her womb particularly, is typological of the tabernacle, the Levitical sacred space (p. 46; cf. p. 181). [4]
There is a duality between the man and the woman as well. In addition to the Christ/Church typology, Byrd connects the man to earth and the woman to heaven, explaining that “in the first man and woman we see representation of the anticipated union of earth (man, as from the dust) and heaven (woman, as not from the dust)” (p. 108). For Byrd, second implies better. The fact that the woman was created second gives her a kind of preeminence, just as Christ was the second and better Adam (p. 179). This is seen both in the order of her creation and in its substance. “She was the crown of creation. She was not from the soil of the earth but was an eschatological marker. When Adam saw the woman, he saw his telos, what he was to become . . . “ (p. 44). And again: “ . . . her very presence [is] beckoning him to the ultimate hope – or telos – of mankind as the collective bride of Christ. Created second, she represents the second order – the final act of creation . . . . “ (p. xii).
One again my reactions are mixed. I do think the Christ/Church typology is strong. I think there are also clear connections in Scripture between women and wells, though whether this is typological is less clear to me. I think there are also good reasons to connect the woman of the Song with the holy city and the New Jerusalem. Here Byrd’s interpretation makes sense of language which we otherwise might not find to be a very flattering description (Song 8:10).
On the other hand, I think Byrd goes much too far in connecting the man/woman pair with earth and heaven. She misrepresents the creation account when she speaks of man as being made from the earth but woman of heavenly substance. Genesis 2 tells us that Eve is made from Adam and therefore also, albeit secondarily, from dust. The witness of Scripture is very clear that they are made from the same stuff. Man and woman together, not woman alone, are the crown of creation. To the degree that the woman represents the Church, I suppose she does point to humanity’s “telos” (another favorite word of Byrd’s), but here again Byrd goes too far. In her attempt to redeem women from those who may degrade them, she errs on the other side, elevating women to a status above that of men. In doing so, she not only degrades men but even perhaps Christ Himself as the woman/Church is exalted over the man/Christ figure.
Practical Applications for Men and Women
One of Byrd’s primary goals is to enable us to better understand and live a biblical conception of gender. While our tendency is to define male and female in opposition to one another, Byrd largely rejects this kind of dualistic interpretation. To the extent that she does distinguish between masculinity and femininity, she looks to the model of Christ and His Church, arguing that “[w]e need to begin with Christ’s spousal love for his bride” (p. 91). Christ’s love is the model of all human love (p. 66) but especially of the love of husband for wife. He is first to love; she responds to this love. In one aspect, we are all feminine in that we are part of the Church, His bride, and as such are receivers of God’s love (p. 68). Men do not need to behave a certain way in order to be men. They are masculine because they are men and women are feminine because they are women (p. 111). There is more similarity than difference: “We are not directed to masculine manhood or feminine womanhood. We are not even directed to biblical manhood or biblical womanhood. We are men and women who are together directed to Christ.” (p. 112)
While Byrd does not draw hard lines between masculinity and femininity, she does implicitly acknowledge male leadership and she does draw conclusions about what it means to be a good leader with the implication that this is how men in power should treat women, and all laypeople, in the Church. As stated at the beginning, one of Byrd’s goals is to restore the dignity of men and women. In her language dignity and personhood are closely linked. She relies on a definition of personhood which she takes from Diane Langberg who defines it in the context of abuse. For Langberg the three components of personhood are: to have a voice, to be in relationship, to have power and shape the world (p. 172). Christ, Byrd says, empowers His followers and so good human leaders, following His example, do not fixate on their own power but seek to empower others (p. 128). Conversely, to limit another’s power is to deny their personhood (p. 121). Just as the lover in the Song calls for and longs to hear his beloved’s voice, so good “[l]eadership brings out the voice of others . . . It gives power to, because leadership recognizes personhood and dignity in men and women and sees them as gifts” (p. 188).
Byrd also brings her ideas about power back to the first chapters of Genesis. To have power she links to being made in the image of God (p. 190). As an aspect of the image, it is inherent in all people, not just males. She spends some time on the last part of Genesis 3:16 which the ESV (in line with CBMW interpretations) translates as: “‘Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you.’” For Byrd, this “desire” of the woman’s is a good, God-given desire for her husband which mirrors the right desire of God’s people for Him. As such, this desire is something we should all cultivate (p. 95). It is a desire which is frustrated in this life and in as far as it focuses on one’s spouse because only Christ can rightly fulfill it (p. 78). She lists a few possible interpretations of the man’s “ruling” at the end of the verse. But in the end opts for that of Anna Anderson who says that “ . . . the woman’s good desire is now thwarted or unrequited . . . “ (p. 96). Byrd at once redeems the woman’s reputation in this verse while impugning the man’s. It is not, she would say, that all men are domineering but “[t]he first ten chapters of the first book of the Bible reveal ‘the striking link between male domination and violence.’” (p. 97) Genesis 3:16 “is not telling us that all men are violent, but that male dominance and violence as the result of sin would be a key factor in thwarting the woman’s desire.” (pp. 97-8).
I start out agreeing with Byrd — I do think we overdraw the distinctions between masculine and feminine and that we share more in our discipleship than we differ in our gender. But then I think she goes too far again she starts talking about personhood and power. To begin with, Langberg’s definitions may be helpful in the context of abuse, but they do not give us a biblical definition of personhood. There are plenty of people in this world who have no voice and no power whom I would still consider persons. Victims of severe abuse whose tormenters rob them of voice and power and relationship may feel robbed of their personhood but Scripture tells us that they are still people, valuable in the eyes of their Creator.
I could say a lot on Genesis 3:16. (In fact, I am preparing an essay on it which looks back at the Hebrew to understand the words it uses.) For now I will just say that Byrd in an effort to redeem women from a perceived slur shifts the fault to men who, while perhaps not all domineering jerks, are apparently so prone to abuse their power that they are the main cause of violence in the world. I would also quibble with Byrd’s contention that Christ’s example of leadership is one of empowerment. There is a sense, perhaps, in which Christ does empower us — to resist sin, for example — but I am not sure we can take this as a model for human leadership.
Concluding Thoughts
There is a lot more I could say about the content of Byrd’s book (including a number of more minor points I am itching to refute), but I would like to try and stay focused on the big picture. My zoomed out take on The Sexual Reformation would be that it starts with a very real problem, how the Church defines male and female and how they relate to one another. It takes us back to a better footing in our interpretation of an oft-misunderstood book, the Song of Songs. In the process, Byrd makes some good and valid points, for example in reemphasizing the typology of the man and woman of the Song as Christ and the Church.
But my biggest criticism is that Byrd often just goes too far. Another book I read recently talks about how we know and the patterns we form of the world [5]. Byrd clearly has a pattern and she seeks to apply it to such a degree that she tends to overstep and see what she expects everywhere. In her effort to bring back dignity to women in the Church, she swings too far the other direction and robs men. I find her scholarship a little sloppy as well. She has a tendency as well to present an interpretation as a “perhaps” and then to run with it or to present a variety of interpretations on a given point and then to select the one she likes without actually giving evidence in support of it.
Beyond that, I am just not sure Byrd makes the case she thinks she does. She is clearly very invested in her subject and she is good at identifying the problems, but in the end I still don’t see how our bodies “tell the story.” I don’t find myself walking away from this book with an explanation of gender that I can explain to others.
Notes:
[1] Aimee Byrd. The Sexual Reformation: Restoring the Dignity and Personhood of Man and Woman. Grand Rapids: Zondervan Reflective, 2022.
[2] One pet peeve would be that she uses words like allegorical, typological, and symbolic, and even speaks of “echoes” within the text but does not clearly delineate these terms or even make clear where her interpretation falls.
[3] I would recommend to you my own denomination’s publications: The Gospel & Sexual Orientation and Gender as Calling: the Gospel and Gender Identity (Crown and Covenant). You can see my booklist for gender issues here.
[4] For this last point, the Levitical sacred space, Byrd cites Richard Whitekettle. She does not fully explain his argument, however, or tell us what the connection is between womb and sacred space. She does relate the laws to protect women and to purify them after their periods or childbirth to their tabernacle typology (p. 48). Later, in another statement which is not fully explained, she says: “In the act of giving birth, woman typifies the birth of the church through messianic suffering. The womb is a prototype of that true, fortified city.” (p. 201)
[5] See my review of Esther Lightcap Meek’s Longing to Know.